randomfixation


minor revision

Posted in random on November 10, 2007 @ 4:24pm

Yesterday’s melancholy was quite out of the ordinary. Thankfully the normal order of things has since been restored.

pathetic

Posted in random on November 9, 2007 @ 7:45pm

I feel small.

I know without doubt the soundness of the truth, yet I tempt myself with delusions of the salience of a lie. Where I should already be so confident and able, I strive to do well but fail consistently. I don’t trust myself any more; I risk so much for so little in return. And I feel no comfort because everything that remains can crumble in an instant.

I feel even smaller.

imploringly

Posted in random on October 10, 2007 @ 7:53pm

What do I want? Would I know that I had it, if indeed it was mine already?

Or perhaps I should ask, how much should be enough? And is that objectively or subjectively determined – for me to decide, or to be decided for me?

Alas, no answers are forthcoming…

say cheese

Posted in random on September 25, 2007 @ 1:25pm

I took some photos with a great SLR camera on the weekend.

Can you say Flickr?

vanilla

Posted in random on September 18, 2007 @ 11:07pm

Actually, I feel nothing. Whatever momentary delusion I was under certainly doesn’t reflect any ongoing state of being. Must have been a glitch.

I could, of course, be angry. Recently I’ve been given plenty of reason to be viciously enraged. But I’m not. I could be annoyed senseless at certain people or things. There’s ample justification. …Nope, not. I could rail against the situations and circumstances, fly off the handle, be downright mean. Perhaps that would fix a few things. At least things would change.

There’s just nothing there. It’s easier not to feel them at all.

Vanilla is a flavour, after all…