You have been warned. Or you will have been. Whatever.

I am officially Rocking Out tonight. It’s just me, here in my solitude, entombed in my bedroom haven. But for now, with only a little imagination, I could be hanging off the stage at the loudest, blackest, rocking-outest metal concert this clean-cut jazz-loving ballad-playing anti-emo ever dared to think about dreaming about.

There is head nodding. And rocking back and forth in time with the rocking out drummer as he punctuates every slide, slap and sizzle the bass player coerces from his axe. Eerie, haunting lead vocals. Crunchy, angry electric guitar distortion cranked up to 11.

And I just turned it up. Rock. Rock on.