I am about to be fixated by the film, The Flight of the Phoenix. It won’t be all pleasant – there may be tears. Spoilers follow. More after the jump…

So I’ve hired The Flight of the Phoenix for the princely sum of $1 (and for a week at that), but after chewing it for a couple of hours I’m left with a bland aftertaste, much like the one I would acquire if I masticated the DVD case for the same amount of time. There are some good performers – Giovani Ribisi does a good job, Miranda Otto’s Australian accent is perfectly balanced and Hugh Laurie is both cold and, at a point, quite evil. And the cast is certainly a motley crew. However, this doesn’t account for the sour remnant I’m dealing with.

There is a point during the movie where Giovanni Ribisi’s character Eliot – the designer of the new Phoenix – is exposed for only being a model aircraft builder. According to the commentary, this is the moment at which I should be feeling intense mistrust and betrayal, because of the deception Eliot had perpetuated. However, Eliot’s comments were to the effect that every aeronautical theory which needed to be applied on a model scaled to be applicable on a full size plane. He was voicing his belief that the theory he understood could be applied regardless of its apparent implausibility.

The other actors’ performances at this moment were completely adequate, and Dennis Quaid was explosively expressive. The rub is, I believed Eliot. I didn’t care that he was a model plane designer because the theory should work out on whatever scale. Obviously the film was targeted at a more emotional, less logically-blinkered viewership.

Nice locations, some standout performers, and one decent explosion. The special features make me dislike the director intensely – his explosive and abusive reactionary direction is contrary to what I deem to be either professional or polite. Ultimately, a typical Dennis Quaid effort with a disappointingly predictable finish. It’s deus ex machina with the “deus” not so “ex”.

Sorry to spoil it for ya, but it’s not like they won’t be successful with their plane building exercise. Hollywood it is. Fabulous it isn’t. 1 star.